Sex. What does God think?

Genesis 1:27-28 --- God created people in His own image; God patterned them after Himself; male and female He created them. God blessed them and told them, "Multiply and fill the earth and subdue it."

Hebrews 13:4 --- Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

God came up with the idea of sex.
He invented it. The copyright belongs to Him!
God is pro-sex. (is the point getting pretty clear?)
Some people think that God is against people having sex... not hardly. He wants married people to have lots of sex! God made sex to be something enjoyed by a husband and a wife. It was never intended to be done outside of marriage.

A lot of people seem to think it's ok to have sex before marriage. What does God say?

1 Corinthians 7:2-3 --- But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his 'marital duty' to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 --- It is God's will that you should be (set apart to be holy): that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.

1 John 2:16 --- For everything in the world--the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does--comes not from the Father but from the world.

The world says, "If it feels good, do it." But God says that we are to remember that we are "set apart." We are not to think & act like the world does. We should try to live 'in' the world, but not be like it when it comes to sin. God wants us to keep ourselves pure.

Is sex only for reproduction, or is it for enjoyment in marriage, also?

Proverbs 5:18-19 --- Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth.... let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love.

Need I say more?

What if I don't do
it, and just sort of
think about
having sex with somebody?

Matthew 5:27-28 --- You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Jesus said that even thinking sexual stuff about someone that isn't your wife/husband is a sin.

 

Job 31:1 --- I have made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.

Why don't you consider doing this also. It's a great plan. And if you don't look, then it gets harder to lust.

What if I want to
stop sinning sexually...
can I 'start over?'

1 John 1:9 --- If we confess our sins, He (God) is faithful to forgive our sins, and cleanse us of all unrighteousness.

Romans 1:24 --- God let them go ahead and do whatever shameful things their hearts desired.

God will not forgive sin when someone intends to keep on doing it. The word "confess" means to agree with God about their sin. If they truly agree, then they'll stop doing it. The word 'repent' means to turn from the sin and go the opposite direction - righteousness. Willful, persistent sin gets no forgiveness until the person truly wants to change. But as soon as they do want to change, God will forgive them, and help them stop sinning. It won't be easy, especially sexual sin, but God will help.

 

It's really hard for
me to quit this
sin... how can
I stop?

James 5:16 --- Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

Mat 5:29 --- If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

Confess your sin to someone else. This helps you to break the bondage of keeping this a secret, and they can help hold you accountable by asking you frequently how you're doing.

Jesus didn't mean to literally poke your eye out. He was being figurative. Basically, His point was "if you can't handle something in your life (even if it's a good thing), then get rid of it." For example, the internet is a good thing... but for a person who struggles with porn on the web, he may need to stop surfing online for a while. This principle could even apply to a relationship. Having a girlfriend or boyfriend can be a good thing... maybe even sent from God... but if you can't handle them responsibly, then you need to break up for a while. Make sense?

 

Here are some practical steps.

First of all... you need to give your life to Jesus Christ if you haven't already. Click here for how to do that.

5 important steps. 

• Repentance. God will only help you quit when you really want to. Repentance is when we genuinely turn away from our sin, and leave no loopholes in our mind of how we'll go back to it someday. It doesn't mean that we'll be perfect, but it does mean that we're not half-hearted in our confession and apology to God.

• Reclaiming ground. When we sin, we give Satan ground in our minds that he has the right to stand on. After you repent, then speak out loud something to the effect of, "I resist the devil, and reclaim this area of my mind and my life for the glory and ownership of Jesus Christ."

• Tearing down strongholds. Strongholds are based on lies. Find the lies that you've been believing while doing this sin (an example of one lie might be that you thought it was worth the momentary pleasure to sin against God). Then, reject that lie, and ask God to tear down that stronghold. This may take time to realize all of the lies that were working against you. The only way to tear down a lie is to replace it with a truth that you believe deep down.

• Building towers of truth Once you realize what lie you were believing, then replace it with the truth. I'm telling you, this is very, very powerful!! The truth really will set you free... but only when you really believe it deep down inside. Head knowledge doesn't matter on this one.... heart knowledge is necessary.

• Taking every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. Bathe your mind in the scriptures. Memorize Bible passages. Whatever you think about is what you're going to do. Think about godly things. Make it your goal with God's help to someday have every single thought for an entire day to be pleasing to God... totally sinless.

Prayer. I know someone might think that we're supposed to say this because we're a church site and stuff.... but prayer really does work. And don't throw out a little 10 second prayer and expect to overcome a big sin in your life. You need to get serious about prayer to kick this thing.

Scripture memorization. This is actually a very, very powerful tool. Remember what Jesus did in response to Satan when he was tempting Him in the desert... He threw scripture at him. When you're tempted, quote (out loud) some verses that address the situation. A great passage to start memorizing is the first several verses in Proverbs 5. The 'adulteress' can be viewed as not only an actual person, but also a temptation and sinful desire.

Accountability. You need to confess this struggle of yours to a trusted friend or leader. Make sure you can trust this person to be sensitive and private with this issue. Then, have them ask you frequently how you're doing. Also, you may want to have an agreement with them that every time you stumble in this area, you have to tell them within 24 hours. I promise you, you'll either quit this sexual sin or you'll quit telling them.... one or the two will happen. So, stay committed to telling them. It might be hard at first, but it will help you win this battle against lust. And another thing... one of Satan's big tricks in the area of sexual sin is that it's embarrassing to talk about with someone... therefore he knows that he has you trapped... all alone. Break free by telling somebody.

Avoid tempting situations. If you know that a certain time or place or whatever is where you are normally tempted, then avoid it like the plague. For example, some couples struggle when the movie is playing (some couples pay a lot of money for movies, yet only see a few... if ya know what I mean).  Many couples struggle sexually when they begin to kiss for extended amounts of time. Or whatever. Try your best to avoid situations where you know you're more likely to be tempted.

Links...

How far is too far?

10 reasons to save sex until your married